Amit Ka Alarm

Is topic pe bat karna kafi khatarnak sidh ho sakta hai because "Amit" kafi hasht puscht aur tandoorust kism ka Banda hai.... Germany ki police be bharoosa rakhte hue main aage likhne ki himmat kar raha hoon... ( Its about my friend Amit Singroha )
"Amit Ka Alarm"
I shifted in Amit's room as i needed accomodation for few days before i can finally shift to Heidelberg for begining my Internship. Its truly said "an idea can change your life but I felt later it should have been rewritten as "a bad idea can ruin your life". Aakhir Utpeden aur atyahcar ki bhi koi seema hoti hai.

Before I explain the Alarm Saga, I want to write little bit about my friend Amit, who is a wonderful human being and offcourse yaaro ka yaar. Some of his wonders are as follows:

1. This guy Loves Butter and desi Ghee... he loves it as much as an old man loves his artificial teeths or as much as a German girl loves her American Boyfriend..Without butter he cannot eat his dinner..He puts a thick slice of butter in any kind of sabzi and eats it. This shayri perfectly explains his love for butter: "Amit aur uska ghee aksar yeh baatein karte hain "tum na hote toh main kaise hota, jispe ghee bolta hai amit se, abe tu na hota toh mera market mein itna rate bhi na hota".

2. He Smiles a lot and has a very cute Smile( isko hamesha hasne ki itni buri aadat hai ki, kabhi kabhi shak hota hai ki yeh wakai mere chutkule pe hasa ke mere pe hasa". Leave that, he is teaching some chineese how to Smile, first tip that he gave to them was - try to open your eyes when you want to smile. In returns, he asks them to cut his hairs as saloon is quite costly here in Germany, I wonder who benefits more in this deal.

3. He likes fruit juices a lot and can drink them irrespective of the occasion or gathering, sometimes he gets drunk by juices only. bhai aakhir Beer aur alchohol mein aakhir hote toh fruits hi hain naaa.

4. He likes washing his dirty clothes using others money in the washing machine, he will wake up at 2am in night and check if any washing machines are empty, bhai is mamle mein toh Maa kasam India ke baniyo ko bhi isne koso meel peeche chod diyaaa!!

But coming back to "ALARM saga", It was june 2009 when poor me decided to shift in his room for a month, I mean, I never expected that one can play such horrible songs as morning alarm, that can wake you up not thinking its morning, but waking you up to kill the singer or the person who owns that phone (In this case Amit was never an option nor was the singer).

Days passed into weeks and I woke up each day with only one hope that one day Amit will change his alarm, or I will change the room. The irony of the story was that he never woke up by his alarm, He could hardly hear that his alram was shouting at its full voice " Chak lo riwalwar, hum apna kabza lende ae "meaning pick up the gun guys as we are here to get our land back".
Now tell, how for heavens sake can someone keep song with such lyrics as his morning alarm, the mosquitoes in his room prefered to leave the room rather than risking their lives just for few drops of blood. That day I realise a truth of life - that if I will keep even my favorite song as my morning alarm, I will end up hating it in few days.

I was not willing to quit so easily and checked his phone one day to quietly change the Alarm tone, but to my suprise other tones were as follows:
1. Daaru pe ke mele which jat nachdaaaaaaa ( meaning a JAT is dancing in a carnival after getting drunk) How the hell can u hear alchoholic songs early morning????? for those of you who dont know what does JAT stands for, better dont bother, and Just Accept Them.
2. A song of Gurdass mann explaining the benefits of cycles and its eco friendly benefits - Mehngi motor kho oo sasta cycle changa---- OO main kya lala jiiiiiii, gudaan which tyar phad ke, handle sidha kar le, cycle mitra daan shart laga ke phad le....bade paijame aur penta nu mein chaine which phasaya....Now i know after reading such awkward lyrics you will surely wanna try to hear this song, but continue reading and then search for "Gurdass man Cycle on Youtube", and and and his list was endless.

After looking at his playlist, I felt lucky to have the same old alarm tone and quickly realised that this tone was written in my destniy for the rest of my time in his room. It was not only me, his alarm I guess was kind of social service for the floor, as every body on the floor use to hear this every morning as their morning alarms. One french guy who lived in front of his room, once asked me what does this lyrics (of alarm -as he knew the song now by heart) really mean, to which i told him buddy dont ask this as I knew his (french guy) frustration and guessed he will chak his riwalwar to get back his peace of land.

The day Amit got the internship the whole floor was celebrating as they knew Amit will now be moving out from his room. The french, the italians, the Germans and the turks were all hugging each other as if their respective countries have got freedom from India after a long agonising struggle. kabhi kabhi Amit proud bhi hota tha ki aakhir kuch toh aisa kiya hai isne jisse yeh saare gore humare aage jhuke hain aur humshe pareshan hue hain, bus farak sirf itna tha ki goron ke sath sath hum bhure log bhi subha shyam aatyachar seh rahe the.

The people who were living next to Amit's room were by now, so much use to hearing this alarm every day at 6.30 am that they knew that even if Amit leaves this room, the walls, the bed, and the furniture of his room will still humm the tune at 6.30 am everyday and that sound of (humming of bed, furniture and the walls) will still be loud enough to wake them up just to realise that its the time to go to loo (toilet), drink water and slip into bed again.

Your Phatichair, singning off from Latakti building Khada chauraha!!!!